THIS Morning's Ruth Langsford has revealed that she cries in the shower over her sister's heartbreaking suicide.
The TV presenter, 60, has opened up abouttrying to come to terms with her sibling Julia, taking her own life last June, aged 62.
During her recent chat with Prima magazine, Ruth lifted the lid on a number of things – including her first impressions of husband Eamond, how she's managed to cope during lockdown and her passion for fashion.
The chat also touched upon her beloved sister, who sadly passed away last year after a battle with depression.
Ruth, who is the October cover star of the women's monthly magazine, admitted that she spent a long time trying to deal with the emotions and has learnt how to move on with her life, despite still hurting inside.
She told them: "You can’t spend your whole life crying. I’ve done a lot of crying over my sister.
"It’s not even a sense of saying, ‘Pull yourself together and get back to work,’ it’s just that you have to get on with your life and you can’t get on with it if you’re crying all day.
"I’ve learned now that I can have those moments; sometimes, I have a good old cry in the shower and feel better for it. I think it’s good to have a loud, snotty cry."
Julia's decision to take her own life left Ruth with a lot of unanswered questions, but she admitted her supportive family lift her up when she's feeling down.
She added: "It still feels like yesterday that I lost my sister.
"When you lose somebody, it’s just horrible. But when someone takes their own life, it leaves you with so many questions that can’t be answered.
"It was tragic and difficult for all of us, but my sister wanted me to live a happy life.
"I’m lucky that I have a loving husband and a good family, and all I can do is live a happy life in her memory."
Julia was found dead aged 62 at her home in Lingfield, Surrey, by her husband Paul last June.
The ITV host told viewers that her sister had died "after a long illness," and took the week off work.
Taking to Instagram, Ruth paid tribute to her sister with a lovely photo of them with their arms wrapped around each other.
She captioned the post: "My lovely Sis Julia has sadly died after a very long illness.
"My heart is completely broken. She was the kindest and most gentle soul and I will miss her forever.
"As I am sure you will appreciate I need to take time to grieve with my family. Thank you for your understanding."
Six months later it was confirmed by a coroners report that Julia took her own life.
Back in 2010 the pair revealed to the Daily Express that despite being "very different," they are extremely close.
Julia said: "Ruth and I are very different.
YOU’RE NOT ALONE
It doesn't discriminate, touching the lives of people in every corner of society – from the homeless and unemployed to builders and doctors, reality stars and footballers.
It's the biggest killer of people under the age of 35, more deadly than cancer and car crashes.
And men are three times more likely to take their own life than women.
Yet it's rarely spoken of, a taboo that threatens to continue its deadly rampage unless we all stop and take notice, now.
That is why The Sun launched the You're Not Alone campaign.
The aim is that by sharing practical advice, raising awareness and breaking down the barriers people face when talking about their mental health, we can all do our bit to help save lives.
Let's all vow to ask for help when we need it, and listen out for others… You're Not Alone.
If you, or anyone you know, needs help dealing with mental health problems, the following organisations provide support:
- CALM, www.thecalmzone.net, 0800 585 858
- Heads Together, www.headstogether.org.uk
- Mind, www.mind.org.uk, 0300 123 3393
- Papyrus, www.papyrus-uk.org, 0800 068 41 41
- Samaritans, www.samaritans.org, 116 123
“She is the confident one — I would hate to be in the limelight like she is — but she has worked her way up and I’m very proud of her.
“I’m three years older but we were very close as little girls. Our father was in the military so we moved all over the world with him.
“When I was eight I was sent to live with my godparents so I could go to school in the UK for a year.
“That was hard — we missed each other a lot, and later I heard that Ruth kept asking, ‘Where is my sister?’”
IF you are having suicidal thoughts, suffering from anxiety or depression or just want to talk, call The Samaritans on 116 123.
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