AFTER his "hero" dad died from a brain tumour, James Jordan bottled up his grief.
He wouldn't even talk to his beloved wife and dance partner Ola, admitted it was "too painful".
But James says he was forced to confront it while they filmed Strictly The Real Full Monty – and Ola broke down in tears.
James said: "Ola was in tears on the first day. We were doing a piece to camera.
"She couldn't even get past the first question. "I've been speaking about my dad. It's still very raw, it still feels very fresh.
"We don't speak about it at home, I know it's bad but I don't want to. It upsets me. I class myself as a pretty strong person mentally, but for the first time in my life I couldn't cope. I just found it really hard. It destroyed me.
"For someone like Teddy, he went through it at 13. My dad said 'as long as it happens in the right order and I don't have to bury you'. Some people are burying their children. It's horrific."
James and Ola have been working with Diversity star Ashley Banjo, who spearheads the ITV show, to entertain a 3,000-strong crowd – as well as millions of people from home
.But the 42-year-old admits that despite his professional dance experience, stripping off is VERY out of his comfort zone."It's been amazing to work with Ashley on this. It's been inspirational.
"But I think with the stripping side we're still absolutely terrified about. "If we can do it in front of 3,000 audience and millions on TV, then hopefully people can go to doctors."
James was left devastated today following the death of his "hero" dad after his terminal cancer diagnosis in March this year.
He signed up to be one half of the show's first married couple to strip off on stage for ITV's charity special.
But on her first day, his wife Ola couldn't stop crying as the death of her husband James' dad came crashing down on her.
"It has been like therapy," she admits.
"The conversations we've had. It brings back memories and has been quite hard to go back through it.
"As hard as it is getting naked, if it saves someone's life by making them go and get that lump checked.
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